Do you ever wake up in the morning and a mental to-do list immediately crashes through your brain? And you get that rushed, overwhelmed feeling before you’ve even gotten out of bed? It’s almost like your alarm clock is a starting gun, and bang – you’re up and off the the races…racing against time to get everything done!

I certainly have, and  it’s not a nice way to live…but thankfully I have a few tips to help get off the hamster wheel of feeling chronically stressed and frazzled. Keep reading if you’d like to learn how to strategically minimise your to-do list, give up subconscious attachments to being constantly busy (hello, high-functioning anxiety!) and bring more mindfulness to your daily tasks, so that you can feel more calm and centred and even enjoy your day more!

But first, we must investigate a little as to WHY we experience these feelings of stress and overwhelm so often.

Let’s look more closely at that FEELING of overwhelm, because regardless of how much we have to do, it’s that feeling that’s so unpleasant. Lurking underneath our feelings is usually a subconscious thought or belief that’s the real issue. And when we’re overwhelmed the problem is that the mind has “travelled” into the future and is thinking about ALL the other things that still need to be done. But we can only ever DO one thing at at a time, what we’re doing right now in this moment…so we generate stress and frustration in our emotions and bodies because we’re holding on to a mental weight that we can’t actually do anything about right now.

Does that make sense?

Another issue is being unclear as to what’s truly important to do. Our  minds love to think and solve problems, and if we let’em run wild, they can easily fill our to-do lists with 15-20 things that all seem urgent or important… but are they really? We need to be super clear on what’s actually important to us and be willing to say buh-bye the rest.

And the third culprit behind these feelings of frustration and overwhelm, is a little more sneaky…can you believe that you might be a tiny bit addicted to being busy? I know I am as a typical A-type personality. And there’s several reasons for this. Being busy pumps out adrenaline, and just like a strong cup of coffee, that can make us feel alive (then fried). Ticking things off a to-do list also stimulates the reward/pleasure neurotransmitter dopamine, so we get a little buzz when we “acheive” a completed task or check our email for the 142nd time that day. And for women and mums especially, there can be all that societal bullshit behind the scenes in our psyches too:

“I’m a good, selfless mum so I never sit down!”

“Constanly caring about others and putting myself last makes me worthwhile as a person”

“If I’m perceived as lazy or unproductive, I won’t be acceptable or liked”.

It’s worth unpacking these beliefs, and then…changing them!

And lastly, a big cause of being addicted to busy is because we’re trying to out-run the difficult feelings we’d have to feel if we slowed down.

 I’ll give you an example, one of my dear friends lost her mum a few years ago. And while she definitely has a lot on her plate with 3 small kids and a husband that works away, she told me over coffee recently that she just CAN’T STOP. Can’t stop running around doing stuff. Can’t take a 5 minute break even if she does have time for it. I invited her to think about what she might be trying to outrun…and her eyes teared up as she said she’s still feeling so much grief over her mum. We all have difficult feelings we haven’t processed or released, and staying busy is avoidance tactic numero uno.

Okay, so how do we actually change these unhelpful habits? I have 3 simple, practical tips you can practice right away…so take off that cape, super-woman, and burn it like it’s a bra at a 1960s feminist march!

1. Cull Your To-Do List According to YOUR Values

If your brain’s anything like mine, when you set out to write your morning to-do list, you can easily speed-write 15 items before your second sip of matcha.

Are they all important? Yes, of course they are! Well…actually let’s challenge that assumption.

Let’s define what’s important to us, firstly. Minimalism is all about defining what’s truly an essential priority. What kind of life do we want to live? What do we value? Does the way we currently spend our time match our values?

For example, the other day was a nice sunny day after a week of rain. I had a bunch of things I “had” to get done that felt important and urgent and I wistfully hoped that *maybe* I would have time to take my son to the park  *if* there was time at the end of the day. 

But then I checked in with my values. One of my highest values is having quality time with my son and enjoying this sweet time while he’s so little. 

So guess what went at the TOP of my to-do list that day…taking him to the play in the park. Those other things can take a back-seat to my boy, thank you very much.

The second part to mimimising your to-do list? Cut that sh*t down like an over-zealous hedge-trimmer! Challenge yourself to just have 3 things on your to-do list. Or how ‘bout only one? That will train your brain to really zero in on the truly important.

2. “Karma-Yoga” Your Tasks

Karma simply means action, and karma yoga therefore means “the yoga of action”. Both Indian wisdom and spiritual teacher Eckhart Tolle encourage us to not reduce the present moment to a means to an end and to let go of being attached to the “fruits of our labours”, in order to avoid living an unfulfilling, frustrated life. In other words, focus on the process not the outcome…Instead of just doing a task focusing on the end result or what we’re going to get out of it – which could simply be being able to cross it off out to-do list and having it finished – approach each task with the attention, intention and care it deserves.

This can bring more presence, ease and purpose to our day. It’s all about HOW we do something, rather than what we’re doing.

For example, I recently had to buy a present for my sister’s birthday. It was a busy day and I felt like wrapping the present and writing in the card was one more thing I “had” to do and found myself feeling a little rushed and agitated. Thankfully I caught myself, and redirected myself to the true intention of the task – to honour my sister that I love! My frustration evaporated and instead I felt love, true generosity and gratitude to have a sister that I can wrap a gift for, it completely changed my experience of the moment.

We can apply this to all sorts of things – cooking dinner for the family? Do so with a sense of love and care, and make that simple meal to the best of your ability.

Watering the garden? Instead of being absent-minded, connect to how lovely it is to be helping your plants grow.

Completing a project at work? Do your best and remain cognizant of the higher purpose or mission behind the project, it’s likely improving someone’s life in some way.

3. Stay Anchored in the Present Moment

Remember all the way back to the beginning of this rather long post when I said that a lot of our stress stems from the mind travelling into the future and thinking of all the other things that need to be done?

A simple way to counteract that and experience a lot more ease and flow, is to train your mind to stay present in the here and now.

The easiest way to do that? Stay connected to your body, which can ONLY live in the here and now.

There’s several ways to do this.

You could, as you go about your day, keep a portion of your attention on your breathing. No need to change or interfere with your breath at all, but just keep some awareness there to stop your mind running buck-wild all over the place.

Similarly, you can do what Eastern martial artists do to stay grounded, centred and able to react swiftly to whatever comes their way – keep some of their attention rooted in the lower belly. Simply spend a few moments really feeling into this area, and then go about your day with some of your attention there. When the mind wanders, bring it back, as often as you can remember to. Try it and see, changes your whole day.

And lastly, another way is to bring your attention to your senses. What are you hearing, seeing, smelling, feeling on your skin?

For example, you could hang out the washing in a frazzled rush, trying to get it done as quickly as possible while thinking about the next thing that needs doing.

Or, you could slow down a little and notice your senses. Can you feel the sunshine or fresh air on your skin? Hear the birds singing? Smell the grass or the flowers?

Same task, completely different experience.

So there you have it, my go-to ways to stop feeling rushed, busy and overwhelmed. You now have the tools to minimise your to-do list and approach your tasks with intention and presence so you can experience more ease and flow on the daily. If you’d like to learn more tools to live a calmer, simpler life and overcome stress and anxiety, get yourself on the wait-list for the next round of my signature mindfulness program, The Calmer Mind Course here.